The Teachers' Life
by Miz-KTakase
Summary: Welcome to Haven... I mean, Heaven. And welcome to the Golden Week Tales of the Bizarre. In the 36th story, Miss Haruna is going to a place where teachers live happily. But it all goes downhill from here, as Haruna's follower leads to some secrets behind her new paradise. Rated T for language and violence. Complete with various teachers from different animes and cartoons.


It was a clear crisp afternoon, in a middle school. It was a peaceful morning.

"STAND IN THE HALL, MISS TSUKINO!"

Or not.

A woman in a dark pink suit and skirt, with long brown hair, was scolding a girl with long blonde hair, done in pigtails and buns. She was sent out to the hall, with a bucket of water in her hands. She sighed, as she sat down, "Okay, everyone, let's begin the lesson."

* * *

 _This is Miss Haruna Sakurada, occupation: middle school teacher. She lives in a very lovely life, only stressed out. She studies English Class, and even gives lectures to those who are tardy. In reality, she is about to experience a school day she'll never forget._

* * *

Hours later, Haruna was sitting in her chair, in the teacher's lounge, as she was completely tired. It was after school hours. She moaned, as she was yawning, "What a day in class… Why can't Miss Tsukino ever get in line, like the other students?"

She passed out, as she was sleeping. As she snoozed, she started to dream.

 **XXXXX**

That night, at a city, in the middle of a dark night, Haruna was walking down the sidewalk, as the streetlights were dimmed. She heard footsteps, as she saw a feint shadow of her students. She went closer, as she called, "Hey! Hey, you guys! What are you doing, out late?"

She halted, as she paused, seeing the students disappearing. They vanished into thin air, as Haruna gasped in horror. As she turned around slowly…

 **WHAM!  
** She was struck with a blunt object. A girl with long red hair and a red gown dashed off into the darkness, with the bloodied pipe. Haruna was out cold, as she was bleeding from the back of her head.

* * *

 _Miss Haruna Sakurada, at the end of her life. This is the end of our story… but for Miss Haruna, this story is just beginning…_

* * *

 ** _Tales of the Bizarre #36:  
The Teachers' Life_**

* * *

 ** _Miz-K Disclaimer:_** _This fic features teachers from numerous animes and cartoons, just to select a few._

* * *

Haruna was still unconscious and out cold, as another woman appeared to her. She was wearing a canary yellow dress, with long brown hair and glasses. The woman kneeled to her, as she said, "Miss Sakurada? Hello… Miss Sakurada?"

Haruna came to, as she moaned, "Huh?"

She sat up, holding her head, as she asked, "Oh… Who are you?"

The woman introduced herself, "My name is Sawako Yamanaka. Can I help you up?"

"How did you know me name?" Haruna asked.

Sawako said, "Can't I help it? I know who you are, Miss Sakurada. I am a teacher, just like you. I am also your guide, as it were."

Haruna giggled, "A guide, huh? That's just what I needed. I needed one, like a hole in the head."

Sawako scoffed, "Oh, come now. Lemme help you up."

Haruna was helped up, as she held her head, "Ow… What a bump. I was seeing my students, late at night, and the next thing I know-."

"Oh, probably under a lot of stress."

Haruna grabbed Sawako's wrist and barked, "Alright, you… Who the hell are you, and how did you know my name?"

Sawako smiled, "I already told you."

Haruna barked, "You told me NOTHING! Lemme clue you in, pal. I don't like games!"

Sawako said, "Oh, don't be ridiculous. You like to teach students… You, uh, are single, right?"

"Exactly."

"Well, so am I! What school you work at?"

"Jubei Middle School."

"Sakuragoaka High. You can call me Senpai, if you wish."

Haruna said, "Fine, Senpai, but I can't be ordered around. I had a tough day at school, today, and had to lecture, _again_ , a Miss Usagi Tsukino."

Sawako smirked, "You think _you_ have problems? I had to teach an all-girls' school. But enough games. Why, I overheard that you're an excellent teacher and chaperone. You also wanted to find a boyfriend, too, and hope to get married."

Haruna stared at her, "What is it that you want?"

Sawako replied, "Well, as a fellow teacher, it's my civic duty to give you what you want. I mean, I am a leader of a paradise, known as _Teacher's Haven_. And it's absolutely free."

Haruna barked, "Don't put me on! NOTHING is FREE! NO ONE can have peace!"

Sawako laughed, "Oh, come now. You can trust me. Grab my hand, and we'll go together."

They held hands, as Haruna stopped her, "Hey, Senpai Yamanaka! No funny stuff…"

They continued to walk, as they arrived to a huge building. Haruna looked up, as it said " _Teachers' Haven – Experience the luxury of being a teacher (Grades: K to 12)_ ". Haruna said, "Well, I'll be. This is the place, in the middle of the night? Did it belong to a professor?"

Sawako said, "Come with me. I got the perfect room to show you."

They stepped in, as they approached the lobby. A man in curly brown hair and a handlebar mustache saluted to Sawako, "Good evening, Ms. Yamanaka… What an extraordinary night this is."

Sawako bowed, "Yes. It is. This is Miss Haruna Sakurada, of Jubei Middle School. I believe her records say all, Mr. McMcMc."

McMcMc nodded, "Lemme see… Sakura… Sakurako… Sakurahashi… nope… AH! Haruna Sakurada."

He clicked his tongue, as Haruna asked, "Something wrong, sir?"

McMcMc nodded and gave Haruna her keys. He said, "You get to be in our VIT Room, a _Very Important Teacher_ like you deserves one… for your kind. But that's life. Anyway, VIT Room, sixth floor, Room 34."

Haruna giggled, "Uh, thanks. Do I get a roommate?"

"Oh, no," McMcMc added, "In Teachers' Haven, one teacher, one room. It's all very equal."

Sawako added, "This, from a Math teacher from _Polyneux Middle School_."

She said to Haruna, "Alright, then. Off we go."

They went into the elevator, as Haruna asked, "So, he a teacher, too, I'm guessing? He seems upset over the VIT Rooms."

Sawako said, as she agreed, "Well, most of our VITs are good, and some of them are bad. But that's how it is."

"So, I get an occasional great room?"

"Well, perhaps."

They stopped at the sixth floor, as Haruna found Room 34. It even has her named engraved on the small nameplate, under the number. She opened the door, as it was a beautiful one bedroom room with a huge white bed, with sheets. It also has a desk and chair, near the corner, and a huge wooden bookcase next to a hi-fi stereo radio. Haruna was amazed, as Sawako said, "You like it? And it's all free. Teachers who work in high school, middle school, elementary, and preschool, they can live here, and feel refreshed."

Haruna asked, "And no distractions from kids?"

Sawako said, "Well, yes. But there are a few exceptions. Maybe a little visitor or two can help talk about your students' future, like for college, or a new career, or something of a teacher's job."

Haruna said, "Indeed."

Sawako added, "Of course, if you would like, I can make some changes, if you approve."

"No, I approve. Is this part of a deal?"

"Oh, no. It's _already_ part of the deal. Come. We must depart to the master bedroom, and it doubles as a cosmetics salon."

They went in, as they saw a huge room with a vanity mirror, full of makeup and hair coloring, and a closet full of suits and dresses. Haruna gasped, "It's like a paradise… So beautiful… I can't wait to doll myself up!"

Sawako said, "The bathroom's over there, if you like, to give yourself a shower. And we can have you cleaned up, to make you a new you."

Haruna blushed, "I don't know… but you, as my guide, it's like… Ohhhh…"

She sat down, as Sawako explained to her that she can change that ratty long hair into something more appealing. For instance, she was thinking of straightening out her tangles and knots into her hair, and maybe make her mascara more clean and evenly outlined. Haruna agreed, as Sawako said to her what hair color she'd like. Haruna said that she's hoping to be blonde. Sawako agrees, as she went to the closet.

"Now, for the attire, I think red is so not you. AH!" She pulled out a bright cyan dress, as she continued, "It matches your beautiful hair color, once we get done with your style."

Haruna was crossed, as she barked, tossing the blue dress to the floor, "What are you, a distasteful fashion critic?!"

She pulled out a bright purple dress, as she said, "Now, _this_ is a teacher's apparel."

Sawako smiled, "Good choice."

Haruna said, "No deal."

She glared at her, as she barked, "Alright, I was joshing at you, just to gain my trust! Now, what's the pitch?"

Sawako pleaded, "Nothing! Nothing~!"

"Who's your boy? Do you work for someone?"

"Uh, not really… but I do work with a nice man."

"Ah, I see. You got to be in the big leagues, as an all-girls' school teacher, but you're just a suck-up disgrace!"

"NO! It's not true! In my former role, I was a teacher in Sakuragoaka High, and founded the Light Music Club, and its newfound bands. I'm a music teacher, and I studied English, Math-."

"OH, I get it! You're just a spoiled princess, huh? Well, it's not gonna work! Where's the manager?"

She sat down, as she was fuming, "I'm not leaving, without the manager!"

Sawako laughed, "Oh, I couldn't say. He does not show up, often."

Haruna groaned, "I can wait…"

She moaned, as she was nervous. She sobbed, as she grabbed her arms, "ALRIGHT! FINE! Lemme take a shower, first!"

She went to the bathroom, as she took a shower. Sawako shut the bathroom door, as she giggled quietly.

 **XXXXX**

Hours later, Miss Haruna returned from the bedroom and showed herself. She has blonde hair, and a light purple outfit on. She giggled, "How do I look?"

"Beautiful!" Sawako smiled, but pouted in shame, "But I want it to be revealing and sultry, but he didn't want to do it."

Haruna smiled, "Your man knows clothing. But then again, it's nice to be a teacher."

She sat down, as she saw a bottle of whiskey. She asked, "Where did that come from? I don't remember this. But I was a heavy drinker."

She was shocked, as she asked Sawako, "Senpai? What is going on here? I mean, I love my new hairstyle, my new clothes, the comfy bed and the-. Well, I mean… Look, just between you and me, I don't think I belong here…"

Sawako smiled, "Of course you do. Miss Sakurada, remember when we first met, you were in need of a guide, or senpai, if you will, and you said that you wanted it like a hole in the head."

"I never said that!" Haruna barked.

"Yes, you did. And, well, odd coincidence… You are no longer a teacher, to put it simply. And, well, literally, you _had a_ hole in the head, a short time ago… a huge gash from the head."

"No longer a-." She was scared, as she whispered, "No…"

She looked in the mirror, as she sobbed, "You mean… I'm dead? I'm dead?"

Sawako nodded, "Yes. But don't worry. You can still teach, from the afterlife."

Haruna said, as she wept, "I guess you're right. I thought I'd be in paradise, and…"

She realized that she's dead, but it could also mean she's in Heaven. Sawako stated, "Well, you could say that."

Haruna smiled, "YEAH! And you must be my guardian angel!"

"Well, Senpai works better."

Haruna cheered, "My word… YES! I can't believe it!"

Sawako said, "But, of course, only the teachers are to tell that they know that they're in _Teacher's Heaven_. Besides, I-."

Haruna laughs, as she smiled, "Other teachers, huh? Well, we should have a huge party, together!"

Sawako said, "Oh, as a matter of fact, we do have bar nights, for endless drinking. And you can't die of alcohol consumption, being that you're already dead."

Haruna stated, "Yeah, anything I want! I can do whatever I want! I was wondering if you have classes for, I don't know, prop students, like mannequins or robots or something?"

Sawako said, "Oh, well, for whatever you want, you can have what you like, as long as it fits to your academia level. Now, as for the classroom…"

She pointed at the door, with had an LED clock that says "9:00am". Sawako said that this is her personal classroom to teach her "students", and can teach from her dossier. She is only available to teach from 9am to 3pm, every 8 hours. But when she comes out, it only feels like 20 minutes. Haruna opened the door, as the school chimes rang. She was back in her original classroom, as everyone was sitting in their seats. There were students that resembled her old classroom, as they bowed to her. One student who resembles Usagi, in her white school uniform, with blue ascot and skirt, and a red bow, gave her a notebook. She bowed and said, "Miss Haruna, I finished my homework, and I remembered that I was on time, today~."

She smiled politely, as Haruna was astonished. She blushed, as she was amazed. She spoke, "Now I _know_ I'm in Heaven."

The students spoke in unison, "Miss Haruna, you're our great teacher!"

Miss Haruna nearly fainted for joy, as Sawako asked, by the doorway, "Well, will there be anything else?"

Haruna smiled, "You name it, I'll deliver it. Stick around, Sawa-Senpai! I'll let you know, soon. Lemme teach my class, in peace."

Haruna was in bliss, as Sawako shut the door. She then locked it and said, "It automatically unlocks, after 20 minutes."

She blushed, as she giggled giddily, " _Sawa-Senpai…_ I'm so touched…"

She moaned and was walking in different directions, moaning and in awe, being called " _Senpai_ ". She left the room, as Haruna remained in her personal classroom, teaching to her class. Haruna Sakurada was finally living a lifestyle, despite that she was dead now, in which her class is now perfect, including the girl that is similar to Usagi, who now has time to turn in her homework and be on time for class. It was everything she asked for. And Haruna was finally happy.

* * *

Days have passed, as Haruna was relaxing in the bar, having a small drink of orange juice. It was only 10am, in the morning, as she was exhausted. She said, as she looked around, "Well, this is the life, huh?"

She saw a man with black and gray slicked back hair, with a chiseled chin and a bugged out eye, wearing a light blue shirt and dark slacks, chatting with a man with blonde hair, with a thin mustache and a huge head, in a white shirt and brown slacks. In another table, she saw a woman in long brown hair, drunk on her wits' end. She was wearing a yellow long-sleeved shirt and a denim skirt. She was sharing a beer with an elderly woman with curly white hair, a slanted nose, glasses, and a yellow dress with red flowers on it, who was drinking prune juice. Another teacher, a man with dark hair, wearing a green cardigan, with blue jeans, was explaining his problems with teaching, to a spazzed-out man with black hair and glasses, in his messed-up white shirt and black slacks. Haruna said, as she looked at the teachers, "Weird club… Looks like a gallery of unimportant people."

She turned back to the bar, as Sawako appeared, smiling to her. Haruna spat out her orange juice, as she griped, "DON'T! EVER! DO THAT!"

Sawako laughed, "Sorehead. Did you enjoy your day?"

Haruna barked, "Listen, Sawa-Senpai, I know that these teachers are all here, but are they dead, too? Or did they all pass the VIT performance?"

Sawako said, "Well, as a matter of fact, there are plenty to choose from. In fact, ALL the famed teachers, great and tall, big and small, all had high hopes and low roads."

She explained, pointing at each teacher, "See over there, Mr. DeMartino? He was a teacher in Lawndale High, a.k.a. Daria Morgendorffer High School, and had a huge messed-up trouble with a few of his students. Two of which were the alumni's quarterback and cheerleader. Unfortunately, the QB, a Mr. Kevin Thompson, flunked out of Lawndale, _three times_ , before Ms. Morgendorffer's death in Boston. Had to endure learning History classes, every semester. Mr. Lynch over here, he's a teacher in a high school, and a very strict one. People hate him, because he's a tool. And Yukari Tanizaki, a teacher in English. She has so many moments I cannot explain. But she loves to teach English, other than Minamo Kurosawa, a P.E. teacher. Miss Kurosawa is also a VIT teacher; except she's in the _Athletics Wing_ , with Mr. Buzzcut, Coach Roach, uh, and a The Umpire. Then you got Mrs. Barch, a man-hater, who fell in love with Mr. O'Neil, and had a relationship that lasted until the end of days. And then, Mr. Crocker, a fairy-obsessed spaz. Miss Haruna, I'm ashamed to tell you how he got here…"

Haruna asked, "Are they ALL dead?"

Sawako smiled, "Why sure! Every teacher's lifespan lasts a long time. But once you're no longer able to teach, it doesn't mean your life is over. But case in point, you die a teacher, you continue the memories of a teacher, _as_ a teacher! A Ms. Peggy Hill was expected, but she was banned from our elite _Teachers' Haven,_ because she's a _substitute_. We frown upon substitute teachers."

Haruna smirked, "They are surely the backbones of disgraceful teachers."

Sawako said, "Oh, don't be too jealous. Everyone here is nice, but some are all so… rude."

A guitar was playing, as a small man in a purple shirt with a peace sign on it, with glasses, light brown hair, all messy, and a beard, was in his stool.

"Good evening, Teachers of Teachers' Haven. Tonight, I'd like to play you a mellow song, for your viewing pleasure. So, please enjoy it, m'kay?"

He strummed his guitar, as Sawako sighed, "Yeah, that's Mr. Van Driessen. The guy's a 60s follower, but he does have some teaching methods, including how he taught everyone about History and Politics."

Haruna said, "And he's in Heaven, huh?"

Sawako replied, "The guy's a pure saint…"

She asked, "You wanna bolt?"

"Sure. I thought you'd never ask."

They stepped outside, as they went to have a talk together. Haruna was asked how her class is doing, but she said that it seemed too perfect. And that it seems that Usagi, or a clone of her, is a smart student. The Usagi Tsukino she knows always arrives late, always missed the bell, forgets homework, and even eats lunch, during class. Sawako said, "You think that's Hell? Try seeing the elementary school, with Ms. Anderson and Principal Ench. Pure Hell."

"I know." Haruna said, "But, can you give me something that makes me feel like I'm at home? I mean, students have to learn respect and manners, but it's no fun, without any teachers giving lectures about discipline!"

Sawako said, "Well, I can arrange that. It's been, I don't know, twelve hours, since your teaching activities?"

Haruna replied, "Try sixteen hours, Sawa-Senpai. I'm just exhausted, after my _Night Classes_ , you know what I mean?"

Sawako smiled, "Indeed."

They walked together, as Sawako said, "Yeah, it's a wonderful teaching life."

Haruna said, "Anyway, you think you can have me get more students into my class? Like Miss Mizuno in Class 5, maybe?"

Sawako said, "Oh, well, no. I'm sorry. But it has to be students from your old homeroom, as well. See, while this is yours to enjoy: the room, the personal classroom, the free bar, and the clothes, none of it is real, but made for you."

Haruna said, "I see what you mean. I mean, it does feel bleak and lonely. Plus, it's great to hang out with many of my students from Jubei Middle School. But at least I'm not stressed out, all the time, now. It does feel like Heaven, huh?"

Sawako stopped, as Haruna was worried. She then asked, "Uh, but there is some sort of personal matter to tend to. I mean, I'm not so sure if I fit in, being that I am a teacher. But, I'm curious… were there BAD teachers into this haven? This nirvana, if you will?"

Sawako said, "Well, only the special teachers we have that made it to VIT. See, once you are a VIT, everything you have is exclusively for you. But, all teachers in _Teacher's Haven_ are welcome here. Just only the best make our VIT Club."

Haruna said, "Who do you have? I mean, it's not my business to know, but everyone is VIT, right?"

She asked if she wants to know more of the teachers that came here, and Sawako said that she has a Hall of Teachers room in the lobby. Haruna agrees to go there, but is worried that the Hall may be closed. Sawako explained that the place is open for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Haruna smiled and wants to go, but Sawako replied that it's too soon. Plus, she has to teach class in her own private domain of a classroom. Haruna said, "Right. Teaching first, and information later."

Sawako waved goodbye to her, as Haruna pranced away, heading back to the bar, for another round of juice.

 **XXXXX**

Hours later, Haruna and Sawako arrived at the Hall of Teachers' Main Room, as Sawako said that all the teachers' records are there, including the famous teachers and well-forgotten ones. Sawako gave Haruna one of the dossiers from inside the file cabinet, as Haruna Sakurada read the teachers' names.

" _Negi Springfield – Son of the Thousand Master, Father of a female teacher in Mahora Academy_ … He's a wizard, huh?  
 _Rebecca Miyamoto – 10-year old teacher, graduated from MIT. Teacher of Momotsuki Academy…_ Even kids are teachers? Weird. I mean, it did have some intellectual merits.  
 _Edna Krabappel –_ _Springfield's Teacher of the 4th Grade (Currently residing in Heaven)…_ "

She barked, "What is this, some sort of gag? Are these teachers from different TV shows?"

"No. It's real." Sawako said, "These are the teachers that are, were, and have been teachers in their own worlds."

Haruna said, "Indeed, Sawa-Senpai. But I do not see why it has some points for unique classes and traits. I mean, a kid teacher, a kid teacher who is a wizard, uh… Look at this list!"

Sawako smiled, "If it makes you feel better, you and I are on this list."

Haruna said, "This proves nothing… I mean, these people… Well, beat me to the punch, being we are all teachers. And there are weird people, all around. I can't figure it."

She walked off, as she concluded, "But if it don't bother me, I'm okay with it."

Sawako asked, "Where will you be going, Miss Haruna?"

Haruna said, "Oh, I don't know… Grade some papers, get a little drink or two, and when it's ready, I can be _Master of my Teaching Domain_ , again."

Sawako instructed, "Well, if you ever need me for anything, I am on speed-dial: _Sawako Yamanaka._ "

Haruna nodded and said, "Yeah, sure."

She left the Hall of Teachers, as Sawako vanished into thin air. Haruna's days of being a happy teacher continued, as she remained a happy teacher in her afterlife.

 **XXXXX**

But the following week, she was yawning in her desk, as she was given the test sheets from her students. She waved her hand and moaned, "Feh."

She stood up and said, "We'll continue our lesson, tomorrow morning. Class dismissed… or whatever."

Usagi bowed and sobbed, "Oh, Miss Haruna! I forgot my homework! I should give it to you, right now!"

Haruna scoffed, and then grumbled, "Mail it to me!"

She left the classroom, as she stepped out. Her time was up, as she felt unhappy.

"One week of this crap." She groaned, as she shut the door to her domain, "I need a vacation…"

She was suffering the most powerful feeling that a teacher has been given: _boredom_. Miss Haruna was completely bored, after one week of perfection. But she was a bit relieved that she saw Usagi's crying face, being that she forgot to hand in her homework. It, however, still didn't cure her boredom.

 **XXXXX**

At the bar, she was drinking some liquor, as she was pouting. She moaned, "One week of this, and I'm already bored. I miss my old locale. I sure do miss Usagi crying, when she makes a mistake… and there were times that we all had fun together, since Miss Tsukino, Miss Mizuno, and Miss Kino are in the same school. And they have sure good friends… Maybe I can make friends here, in this Haven…"

She sat up, as she looked around the bar. She then saw a woman in long blonde hair and a blue streak on the left side of her hair. She was wearing a blue sweater and jeans, as she waved to Haruna. She asked, "Who are you?"

"My name's Farra." She said, "The teachers are already ready for the bi-monthly trip around the world."

"Huh?"

"I overheard you needed a vacation, correct?"

"Yeah…"

"It's endless here, in the afterlife… But even in death, you still need R&R."

She held her hand, as her eyes turned black and demonic. Haruna gasped, as she whimpered, "You're… You're a demon?"

"Pretty much. But I'm friendly. Come."

Haruna walked behind Farra, as she led her to a huge black jet, on the rooftop. They walked upstairs, heading to the roof, as Farra explained, "Yeah. I am from _Teachers' Haven: Hell Wing_. I am a teacher that tortures the teachers in Teachers' Haven, who's got very bad marks."

Haruna asked, "How many marks do you get for that?"

"One. No one is perfect. Of course, I got fired, after a conflict between suicidal and homicidal teachers. You know that teacher from _Soap_? She's an exclusive member of our _Hell Wing_ , after trying to kill herself, and then changed to kill her own student, but failed, completely."

"Goodness… What did you do?"

"She's locked away in solitary confinement, giving reeducation methods, so she can return to teaching. Lord knows how long this will take."

They continued to walk up the stairs, as Farra asked, "So, you work in Jubei?"

"Yeah." Haruna asked, "Why? You curious about it?"

"Jubei… The home of Sailor Moon. Yeah, I was a fan of her. Back in the dark pits, she offered me a few monsters and demons that were destroyed. Shame that I didn't get the Dark Kingdom's four knights. Brainwashing. How evil that it seems…"

"Oh? You know the story?"

"What am I, the _CBS Storyteller_?! HUSTLE!"

They finally arrived at the rooftop, as all the teachers were heading on board the plane. Farra then held up a small EB radio and called from the speakers, " _Welcome, Teachers' Haven VITs and respected faculty members… This is your stewardess, speaking… School's out, at least for this trip. Get on board, everyone. Welcome to the Teachers' Pet: Flight 976_ …"

Haruna shivered, as Farra's echoes continued to reverb.  
" _976… 976… 976… 976… 976…_ "

She got on the plane, as Farra went inside. The plane flew off. Haruna was sitting by a window, as she was nervous. She whispered, "Scary… Why is this happening to me? An endless class, in endless perfection, and now, a plane that is from Hell."

The speakers called out, as it was the pilot, "Attention, passengers, welcome to a special 3-day trip around the world, non-stop, as we'd like to welcome you to _Teachers' Pet – Flight 976_. I suppose you worry that we'll crash the plane, right? Well, we can assure you that there will be NO fatalities and NO casualties for this plane ride from Haven to back, since everyone else is dead."

Haruna called, "Uh, stewardess?"

Farra left to the other area of the plane, as Haruna tried to call her. But she was stopped by a man in a white shirt and pants. He smiled, "Oh, do not feel too bad about it. No one ever listens to her… being she's only a **HELLSPAWN DEMON!** "

He spazzed and shouted the last three words, as he continued, "Sorry. I was in a bind of a past life. Hi. Denzel Crocker, Dimmsdale Teacher, and proud hunter for… **FAIRY GODPARENTS!** "

He spazzed again, as Haruna smiled, "Hi, nice to meet you. Uh, Haruna Sakurada?"

They shook hands, as he said, "Charmed. But, it was a pain to leave my dear mother, only to join a VIT at _Teachers' Haven_. But they said my records were BAD! I hunt fairies! FAIRIES! Even the word " **FAIRIES** " gives me a rash!"

He broke out in hives, as he cried, "GAH! SEE?"

Haruna gagged, "Ew…"

He groaned, "I blame Timmy Turner for this! Sure, this was the reason why I came here! Countless attempts, countless failures, and even badly stabs to my butt! NEEDLES! I am NOT CRAZY! Soon, when I leave, a refreshed Crocker, I will soon prove the world that there are… **FAIRY GODPARENTS!** "

He collapsed in his seat, "GAH!", and was unconscious. Haruna sighed, "Blamed a student for a figment of his imagination…"

From the left to her, she saw Mr. DeMartino, strangling a plush football player bear, as he was grumbling and snarling, incoherently, "Damn it… Kevin… Seven years of him… Why DIDN'T I chose to RETIRE?"

He made a huge roar in his words, each yell bugs out his right eye, in bloodshot, "Stupid Ms. Li… Stupid Lawndale High… STUPID Daria… STOOOOO-PID Miss Barch! I blame everyone… I don't suppose _you_ have a girlfriend, Mr. _VARSITY!_ "

He ripped the bear's head off and roars, "GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Haruna shivered, as she was frightened, "Seven years?! Wow… Did that Kevin boy flunk out, so many times, just to make him suffer, so much?"

She looked behind her seat, as she saw Miss Finster, the elderly woman, knitting a scarf, as she hissed, "I hate Recess…"

Yukari Tanizaki, the woman in yellow, was sitting next to her friend, Minamo Kurosawa, a woman in a black sweater and jeans, with short black hair. Yukari teases at Nyamo, saying stuff like she's a P.E. Teacher, she'll never get married, or she's a dumbass. All of that strains Nyamo, into a state of compressed anger. All Haruna could do was watch, as every teacher had faults and hates inside their souls. Farra returned, with her sweater lightly tattered, her hair withered, and her face scarred from her right cheek. She then held up a stamp pad and stamped on a wall, which had the names of each teacher, labeled for a " _One-Way Ride_ ". She saw her name, on the bottom of the list, under Mrs. Wingo. Farra turned to her, with her pupils blood red and her eyes black as night. Haruna shivered, as she pleaded that she wants to get off this flight. Farra said, as she fastened her seatbelt, very tightly, "Please remain seated, teacher…"

Haruna was shaken in fear, as Farra said, "The plane is about to set down from altitude, real soon. For your viewing enjoyment, we'd like to present to you the classic Teachers' Haven choice, _The Faculty_."

The teachers applauded, as Yukari laughed, "Sweet! I love that movie! Last week, they played _Class of 1999_! Awesome android teachers!"

The movie screen comes down, as it showed the _Teachers' Haven_ logo. Farra narrated, "But first, a word from our sponsors…"

* * *

In a black and white room, with no color, Farra spoke to the audience, "Hello. Here at _Teachers' Haven_ , we provide the best to bring paradise to all teachers, dead or alive. Let's hear a few testimonials from our regulars."

Miss Finster spoke, as she was in the room, "I was a teacher, and supervisor during recess, and only to watch over those miscreants and hooligans, every single day, including that rotten Detweiler kid and his posse. How I miss my prized student, Randall Weems. At least HE appreciates me."

Mr. Lynch, the man in a small mustache, said, "I used to be a cool teacher, until Coach McGuirk said that I am too boring. I was a teacher that lecture students, including one Brendon Small… whom I have made his life a living hell. And that makes me so happy, that I could die."

Mr. Simmons, a balding man in a green sweater vest and jeans said, "I was a polite young teacher, with a happy-go-lucky attitude. And I was P.S. 118's best teachers. It was a great job to have. But then, my life changed, as I met the greatest kids to teach with. Sadly, I just couldn't take their antics, for so long. That's why I came to here. Paradise."

The logo returned, as Farra concluded, " _Teachers' Haven – the getaway for teachers, whom we don't give a fuck._ "

* * *

The commercial ended, as Haruna was crying in her seat. She was sobbing, as all the testimonials she heard were negative remarks about themselves.

"It's lies… It's lies! All lies!" She bawled, as she pounded the arm of her seat.

Crocker smiled and said, "I know. I know. It's only for three days."

He comforted her, as he said, "There, there. It'll all be over, and we can continue to teach these kids… KIDS! FAIRIES!"

He fell off his seat, as Haruna was still crying.

* * *

Time passed, and the following day, in her domain, Usagi bowed and said, "Here's my homework. I'm sorry that I didn't do my best."

Haruna said, "That's okay, Miss Tsukino… Please be seated."

Usagi smiled and said, "That's good. Oh, Miss Haruna, you're our teaching heroine."

Haruna sighed, as she was upset. She relaxed in her chair, as a girl in long black hair raised her hand, "Excuse me, Miss Haruna?"

 **SLAM!  
** Haruna slammed her hands down and yelled, "Okay, THAT IS IT! I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU, ANYMORE! I AM DONE WITH THIS!"

She was on her last nerve. She finally put her books away and yelled, "Everyone, this is a _FREE Study Period_ for the rest of the day! Do what you want! I DON'T CARE!"

She left her homeroom, and then slammed the door. She growled, "Dumb shits!"

She sat on the couch and saw the homework she was given by Usagi. She ripped it into pieces and said that she couldn't take more of it. She called on her cellphone, as she called Sawako's number. Haruna turned around, and Sawako popped up in her face.

"How can I help you, Haruna?"

Haruna roared, "Will you STOP popping in, like that?"

Sawako giggled, "Anything you say, Miss Haruna."

" _Anything_ I say… _Anything_ I say! KNOCK IT OFF!"

Sawako asked, "Miss Haruna, are you okay?"

Haruna barked, "NO! I'M FINE! EVERYTHING IS SO PEACHES AND CREAM!"

"Something wrong?"

"I'll tell you what's wrong with me. I am a teacher, and I think I'm cursed, being in Teachers' Heaven! Or, in this case, _Teachers' HELL!_ I've been here for a month now, and I can't stand it!"

"Why? What could go wrong?"

Haruna stated, as Sawako was listening, "Alright, Sawa-Senpai, you want to know? I'm scared, I'm tired, I'm so stressed out, and MOST OF ALL, I'M BORED! B! O! R! E! D! BORED! I mean, this place is great, but I just can't take this, for so long! There's no excitement for that!"

Sawako pleaded, "But the teaching. You love the classes you teach."

Haruna whined, "I know! But when the students there are always so perfect and polite, then that's not learning! That's productivity!"

Sawako smiled, "Well, I can arrange _that_. I mean, we can always fix it, so your students can flunk out."

Haruna agreed, but sobbed, "No. NO! I can't do that! Then I'd know. It wouldn't be the same!"

Sawako realized, and then said, "Perhaps maybe you need _one_ student to lecture on, a Miss Tsukino, is it?"

"NOW you're talking! What I wouldn't do to punish Tsukino, for being late, failing exams, and eating in class!"

"Good. Now, for the buckets, would you prefer ten pounds of water, or twenty?"

Haruna halted her and asked, "Wait… Is there a _chance_ that I have her sleep in class, so I can catch her?"

Sawako nodded, as Haruna sighed in anger. She instructed, "Alright, sit down, Sawa-Senpai."

They sat down, as Haruna explained, "Look, as much as you're doing this for me, it just doesn't feel the same thing, at all. I mean, I overheard, during my in-flight sabbatical, from that blonde-haired demon, that the teachers here are negative about their teaching accomplishments! And… the students, praising me, like I am a superb teacher! I, I never thought I'd be bored by being praised! You know? And what's a kick, knowing about a girl sleeping in class, if everybody knows about it?"

She added, "Look… I wouldn't expect a dead teacher to understand this, see, but… being a popular teacher in your own school, being praised by your own perfect students, it doesn't mean anything, if it's set up in advanced. I mean, the R&R, the students, the fellow staff faculty, everything… I love it, it's great and all…"

Haruna sobbed, as she whimpered, "Just between you and me, Senpai… I don't feel like I belong here. I am a teacher, but I somehow don't fit in. If I stay a day longer, hearing negative vibes from teachers, given praise by my perfect students, and relaxing in my bed, doing nothing, I'm gonna go nuts!"

Sawako nodded, as she said, "I understand. After all, _Teachers' Haven_ is everything you'd expected to be. But I have a confession to make…"

She stated, as she started to brim with dark energy, "It _is_ because of your students! An Usagi Tsukino!"

Haruna gasped, as she whimpered. She headed to the door, as she turned the knob. However, the door was locked. She pleaded, "WHY? What are you doing?"

Sawako said, "You know me, Miss Sakurada? I am a popular teacher, except I'm more of a hellish demon, than a heavenly doll!"

Haruna sobbed, "No, please say it's not true… I'm in… _Teachers' Hell?_ "

Sawako laughed, "Whatever gave you the idea that you were in Teachers' Heaven, Miss Sakurada? Have you forgotten how you abused and treated Miss Tsukino? A 30 in English, because she's a klutz, a crybaby, and a dumb student! You always lecture her, and you gave her a sign that says she's a loser! Sending her out to the halls, all the time! You're the meanest teacher I have ever met!"

She removed her glasses, showing her evil stare. Sawako continued, "That Usagi Tsukino is the one person you want to lecture, and make her a model student! Well, I have bad news, Miss Sakurada… SHE'S NO MODEL STUDENT! Yet she plans to go to high school, like all the rest! Be nicer to others, once you get used to it!"

Haruna sobbed, "Why did you not say anything?"

Sawako smirked, "Oh, please… I'm always the school's model teacher, and a role model to those who want to be as cool as me! I was a rocker, the lead singer of Death Devil! And I help founded and revive the Light Music Club, to birth _After School Tea Time_ and _Fresh Leaf Girls_! I AM A ROLE MODEL! AND YOU ARE NOT! WHAT HAVE _YOU_ DONE?"

Haruna sniffled, as she finally know the truth, "Well, it's not too late! I'll change! I will be nicer to Usagi, from now on! I mean, Miss Tsukino! Just… Take me home! Take me away from this Haven! I don't belong in _Teachers' Haven_ or _Teachers' Hell_. I WANT TO LIVE!"

She was crying tears out of her eyes, as Sawako giggled evilly. Haruna wept, "Senpai?"

Sawako smiled, "You _still_ don't get it? This isn't _just_ Teachers' Hell, as you thought it'd be!"

She winked, "Teacher gets an F… Flunked out of life, forever…"

She roared, " **THIS _IS_ HELL!**"

Haruna was completely frightened, as Sawako cackled, as her eyes were twisted and demonic. Haruna Sakurada wasn't just in _Teachers' Hell_ … she was in _Hell_ , personally. She pleaded, as the room started to turn black as blood.

"No! NO! I CANNOT BE IN HELL, OVER ONE LITTLE GIRL! I CAN'T-, **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!** "

She ran back to her domain, as she saw a classroom, full of the same girl with long yellow hair, in her buns and pigtails, and with a smile on her face. They said in unison, "Miss Haruna… We love you! You're an inspiration to us all!"

Haruna sobs, as she was by the doorway, as the Usagis continued to praise and cheer for their teacher, while Sawako's evil cackles continued to echo into her.

"NO! STOP IT! I WANT TO CHANGE!" She cried, "NO MORE! NO MORE! I AM SORRY! MISS TSUKINO! I AM SO SORRY! I'LL CHANGE! JUST BEHAVE BETTER! MAKE IT STOP! I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU, AND JUST GIVE YOU WARNINGS! I'M SORRY! I'LL CHANGE!"

They continued to praise her, as Haruna dropped to her knees and shrieked in horror. She held her head and cried that she cannot be in Hell. She was stuck there, forever, listening to Usagi's praises and perfection.

* * *

"AAGH!" Haruna woke up from her desk, as she sobbed. She was back to her brown hair and red suit. She hugged herself and sobbed, "Nightmare… What a nightmare…"

Everything she just experienced was all a dream. Or rather, was it a dream, or was it a premonition?

Usagi appeared, as she asked, "Miss Haruna… Ma'am?"

Haruna asked, "Miss Tsukino! Uh… I…"

Usagi said, as she was sad, "Ma'am, I'm sorry for forgetting my homework _and_ for being late. I don't know what is wrong with me…"

Haruna petted her head and smiled, "It's alright, Miss Tsukino… I forgive you. But don't ever be late again."

She added, as she was smiling, teary-eyed and breaking her voice, "I promise I'll be not too strict to you… even if you anything in class that makes me angry. I'll just do that to the rest of the homeroom, too."

"Miss Haruna, you okay?" She asked, "Why are you crying?"

Haruna sniffled, "Oh, nothing, Miss Tsukino. Just go home, already."

"Yes, ma'am…"

She left the room, as Haruna sat down in her chair. She nodded, as she said, "Yes… Sawa-Senpai… I did it for you. I promise I will be nice to Miss Tsukino…"

She prayed to herself, as she was given a second chance to be a great role model.

* * *

The next morning, in Jubei Middle School…

" **MISS TSUKINO, I WARNED YOU, YESTERDAY! OUT IN THE HALL!** "

She sent Usagi to the hall, again, this time, without buckets or anything that will punish her. Usagi sobbed, as Haruna was sitting in her desk, giving out roll call.

Minutes later, she returned to the hall, as she said to Usagi, "Miss Tsukino, you can go back in."

Usagi bowed and said, "Yes, ma'am. What happened to the new you?"

Haruna said, "Well, I meant what I said, yesterday, and I am a changed teacher… but…"

She held up Usagi's English exam, with a score 25, and scolded at her, "YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER, MISS TSUKINO! Your score is as even worse than before! If this keeps up, you're going to be going to a _Students' Haven_ , and trust me, it's Hell on Earth, if you know that is true!"

Usagi sobbed, "NO WAY! Students go to Hell? Are you kidding me?"

Usagi pleaded, as she was on her knees, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'll study harder!"

Haruna smiled, as she picked her up, "Well, I'm sure you can do better. Come on. Back to your seat. And please, no more of this… I will promise not to do anything to you, badly."

Usagi agreed, "Yes, ma'am…"

She went back to her desk, as Haruna noticed a lone bucket of water, from out of nowhere. Usagi suddenly tripped over, and the bucket started to fly off.

 **SPLASH!  
** The bucket landed on Haruna's head, as she was completely doused, from head to toe. She seethed in anger, as Usagi sobbed, "Uh-oh… heh, heh, heh, heh… It was an accident. Honest! I didn't know it was there."

Haruna changed, for the better good. She learned not to punish Usagi and other students harshly, from now on…

" **DETENTION!** " She bellowed from the top of her lungs.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Usagi bawled.

Too bad it didn't start, today.

* * *

 _Miss Haruna Sakurada, escaping her own personal nightmare, and is slowly and steadily becoming a role model to her fellow students. Miss Haruna, Middle School teacher, has learned the first steps into becoming a great teacher. And she's going to have to live with it, for the rest of her life… in the " **Tales of the Bizarre** "…_

* * *

 ** _Good night out there, wherever you are…_**


End file.
